Feng Jiuxiao nodded. “Of course, I’m happy.”
Xiao Jiu held his Grandpa’s hand happily and said, “Then let’s go find Mommy.”
“Okay.” Feng Jiuxiao followed Xiao Jiu to the base of a tree where his mother sat.
Qin Shu heard the sound of footsteps approaching and looked up. She saw her master and Xiao Jiu walking over with their hands clasped. She thought Xiao Jiu must have grown tired of fooling around and was finally ready to do his homework.
She did not mind Xiao Jiu having fun but only in moderation. He needed to complete his homework too!
Fortunately, Xiao Jiu was sensible and did not need her to nag at him.
She put down her book and took out a cold towel she had prepared earlier; it was for Xiao Jiu to freshen up.
It was a hot day, and Xiao Jiu was beginning to look like he had been in a sauna for too long.
She smiled and said, “Look at you! You’re as red as an apple.”
Feng Jiuxiao looked at QIn Shu, listening to what she said. It reminded him of her youth when she would flush after having fun, staining her cheeks a vivid shade of red.
He would also take a cold towel to wipe the beads of perspiration off her forehead.
Time passed so quickly. That little girl had grown up and become a mother.
He had missed too much, missed Ling’er’s pregnancy, the birth of her daughter, her first full moon… and her growth.
He had missed those precious moments, never to see them again.
When she first arrived at Mount Qi, Feng Jiuxiao asked her to choose a name for herself other than her real one.
…
She tilted her head and said, “Mommy calls me Xiao Bao.”
“Then how about Ling Bao?”
“Master can also call me Xiao Bao. Mother said that we are close.”
…
“Xiao Bao,” he called out.
Qin Shu paused and looked up at her master. Master used to call her Xiao Bao when she studied martial arts under him on Mount Qi. He rarely, if ever, called her Xiao Bao these days.
There was something nostalgic in the way he called her. She did not know if it was her imagination, but she felt an inexplicable difference in the way he called her now compared to back then.
“Master,” Qin Shu subconsciously answered.
The next second, she was embraced by her master, and she heard Feng Jiuxiao say, “Xiao Bao, why didn’t you tell me earlier that you are my daughter?”
Qin Shu was stunned. The sudden recognition of their relationship had caught her off guard. How did Master know?
Looking over her master’s shoulder, she saw Deputy Jin standing at the door, and everything clicked into place.
Deputy Jin could not have had an easy time.
The aforementioned man eyed father and daughter as they hugged each other under a tree and felt like he had accomplished a great deed.
He sighed, a myriad of emotions in that long, drawn-out breath. They had finally acknowledged each other.
Jin Cheng could not imagine what was going through Brother Jiu’s mind. To suddenly have a daughter… Brother Jiu must be happy.
“I…” Qin Shu was rendered momentarily speechless. It had come too suddenly, and she had not been prepared. She was at a loss.
Feng Jiuxiao said: “From the day I first saw you, I had hoped you would be my daughter. Unfortunately, all these years, I have been too stupid. I should have checked you myself instead of blindly listening to Ling’er.”
Qin Shu agreed with her father’s sentiments. She had thought their meeting on Mount Qi was the first either of them had met the other. Now, it seemed that was not true.
“Master, when did you first see me?”
“When I found Ling’er, you were already in kindergarten. I subconsciously thought you were my daughter, but Ling’er said you weren’t,” Feng Jiuxiao replied.
It was Qin Shu’s first time seeing her master so excited. He had always been calm and composed, his face a cold, expressionless mask that did not betray his emotions. Yet, at this moment, his voice trembled with barely restrained joy… and deep regret.
She might not have picked up on these emotions if she had not been a mother herself.
Being a parent changes a person’s perspective. Qin Shu could imagine what it must have felt like being unable to watch her grow up, all the milestones, all the many interesting things one experiences as they journey with their child to adulthood… It coalesced in regret. Her father would never get the chance to relive what he had missed.
Feng Jiuxiao suddenly thought of the car accident he had plotted, taking Ling’er away but leaving Xiao Bao alone in Jiangcheng. He often thought that she still had a family by her side and would take good care of her, but he did not know how wrong he was. She had been alone with no one to stand by her side.
Not a mother or father – no one.
“I’ve been too selfish… I-I left you alone with no one to care for you all because of pride and jealousy. I-I’m sorry.”
Qin Shu had long guessed the truth of the matter. Still, it was one thing to postulate and another to have her thoughts confirmed. Those days following her mother’s disappearance were some of the darkest days in her life.
She said gently: “It’s all in the past, Daddy.”
In the end, she still acknowledged him as her father.
When Feng Jiuxiao heard his daughter call her ‘Daddy’, he was so happy that he could jump for joy, but it also elicited feelings of guilt and heartache.
Softly, he asked, “Do you blame me? I-I understand if you hate me. I never gave showered you in fatherly affection and even spirited away your mother who dotes on you, leaving you to fend for yourself, alone.”
Qin Shu nodded in agreement. “I do blame you. You abducted Mother, sealed my martial strength, and left me to the wolves. When others bullied me, I had no one to stand up for me, or means to stand up for myself.”
Feng Jiuxiao felt like he had received a slap to the face. He was only now beginning to see the extent of his daughter’s suffering. To think there would be those who would bully his precious little girl!
“It’s Daddy’s fault. I should not have obliged your mother’s request to seal your martial strength.”
Time was tight, and the situation back then did not give him much room to consider his options. Hence, he followed through with Ling’er’s request and erased Qin Shu’s memory, sealing her strength and making it seem like she had never studied on Mount Qi. In hindsight, it was one of many mistakes he committed.
Qin Shu realised that although he was a man with a cold and indifferent personality, Feng Jiuxiao was a man of deep affections.
“It’s all in the past. What was bitter is now sweet. I think it’s a worthy compromise,” she comforted.
Feng Jiuxiao was trapped in a maelstrom of emotions he did not know how to begin unpacking. He let go of his daughter, sighing in the depths of his heart. His baby girl had grown so big…
Xiao Jiu had been looking up at his mother and grandfather. He was happy for them.
Ling’er stepped out of the manor in a white checkered dress made by Xiao Lan. She witnessed the touching scene and hurried over.
“What happened?” She asked gently.
Feng Jiuxiao held her in his arms. Although she had lied to him about their daughter, he was neither angry nor begrudging of her actions. He merely cursed his stupidity.
“Ling’er,” he called out.
“What’s wrong?” Ling’er asked in puzzlement, turning to Qin Shu with a raised brow.
Qin Shu had always found herself feeling conflicted when facing her mother. She did not want to sadden her mother, but she also did not want to deceive her, and the more she struggled with her inner conflict, the longer she was paralysed by indecision.
She settled for a smile and said, “Mommy, I called him Daddy. Daddy should be happy.”
“Is that so?” Ling’er retracted her gaze and looked at the man, who held her in his arms. Feng Jiuxiao smiled helplessly. “Why do I feel that you are happier than me?”
Feng Jiuxiao did not know what else to say. He regarded the woman in his arms and said, “That’s because of you.”