Music Recommendation: What if? - Guy Jackson
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Theodore stood in front of the basin of his room, splashing water on his face a couple of times before he raised his head to look at his reflection in the mirror. The cuts on his face looked deep, and the bruises had started to darken. He looked straight into the reflection of his eyes, and he recollected what just happened a couple of minutes ago in the main hallway of the castle.
Turning away from the mirror, he picked up the towel that was nearby, and he dabbed it on his face, which caught drops of blood in it.
When he went down to meet Calhoun, who had returned from the forest after burying Lady Madeline's grandmother, Calhoun raised his eyebrow at him.
"I thought something was wrong with the way the servants were scurrying away in the corridors. What happened?" questioned Calhoun looking at Theodore's bruised face.
"It was Samuel," replied Theodore.
Calhoun's lips twisted into a subtle amus.e.m.e.nt, "Did you finally beat him up?"
"Lucy must have confronted him before he came to fight me. She said she wants to dissolve her marriage with him and doesn't want him in the castle," explained Theodore and instead of being angry, Calhoun smiled, but he didn't comment on what was on his mind.
"It is good to see him out of the castle as well as from Lucy's life. She finally decided to take a stand," murmured Calhoun, pleased with his sister's decision. "Send the servants to fetch her clothes and things from the Grivelle's mansion. I would prefer her to not go and meet him again. She can stay here in the castle."
Theodore nodded his head, obliging to Calhoun's words.
When it was night, Theodore had returned to his room, and he lit the candles to bring light to the room along with the fireplace. Thinking back about what happened today, he looked at the door. He had waited for years.
In the past, he had tricked himself into believing what he was doing was for Lucy's good as she was a married woman.
Before coming to the castle, his past reputation was where he had slept with married women, and people who were in the same circle were aware of this. He didn't want to taint Lucy's name, and he had kept his distance, watching her from afar. Samuel had been punished by none other than Lucy herself, and Theodore couldn't tell how pleased he was by this.
He knew earning back Lucy's trust and feelings would take a long time.
Theodore also knew he had played dirty with Samuel to gain Lucy's sympathy, but Samuel had been playing dirty for a long time. Right now, Lucy had no husband who could control and manipulate her, no aunt who could taunt her. The princess was finally free to do what she wanted with no strings attached to her.
The night continued when Theodore caught sight of light appearing outside his door along with a shadow. He frowned, wondering if it was a servant who had been sent by Calhoun for important matters but he heard the person behind the door sigh, he realized it was Lucy who stood in front of his door.
As he walked towards the door, he felt nostalgic. The last time she had arrived at his door was when he had broken her heart.
He opened the door to find Lucy in her night dress, holding the lantern in her hand and in another hand he caught sight of a box. She looked like a deer being caught during a hunt.
"Want to come in?" Theodore asked her before stepping away from the door.
Lucy stepped inside his room, placing the lantern on the ground and looked around his room.
"Were you going to sleep?" she inquired, noticing the bed and the covers.
Theodore was happy to see her here. He had been watching her for so long in the shadows that it was impossible for him to get anything wrong because he knew she would come to see him. He pulled a chair for her to sit on.
He answered, "I had a few parchments to go through which was given by Mr. Fitzwilliam over the tea estate in Humsbrey."
She nodded her head, but didn't take a seat on the chair that he had pulled for her. "I bought the first-aid box." His wounds didn't look like they had gotten better and it was her fault he had been hit. If she hadn't uttered Theodore's name to Samuel, he would have never gone hunting Theodore.
As if reading her mind, Theodore asked her, "Do you hate me so much that you said something to Samuel that made him punch me?"
Hearing this, Lucy pursed her lips. She remembered the times when Theodore had hurt her and then said, "Sit, so I can tend the wounds."
Theodore noticed the blood rushing beneath Lucy's pale skin and it seemed like he was right.
He removed his glasses before taking a seat on the chair. He watched her open the box and pick up the cotton as if everything was back to normal between them. It was only a couple of days ago that Lucy was dodging him, not wanting to stay in the same room, but here she had come to his room out of her own will and kindness.
Lucy then stepped closer to Theodore, leaning forward and she started to tend the wounds with the cotton dipped with medicine. Her heart squeezed and she tried not to meet his eyes.
"I apologize for what Samuel did."
Theodore could hear her soft breath and with her face so close to his, it distracted him from little pain he felt from the cuts and wounds. Her lips were rosier and her eyes not once looked at him as if they were concentrating on healing him.
"You shouldn't have stepped between us earlier. I had only started to enjoy the fight. Ouch! Did you come to tend or worsen the wound?" Theodore asked her when she pressed the cotton on his wound. When a chuckle escaped his lips, Lucy felt her heart skip a beat.
Why? She asked herself. After all these years why did her heart still beat like this.
It seemed like they both had hurt each other and Theodore didn't seem to mind it. But she hadn't healed and she was still wounded from the past. She realized she had stopped dabbing the cotton and was now staring into his eyes, their faces in front of each other.
Quickly Lucy stepped away as if she was done tending his wounds and she started to put things back inside the box.
She heard Theodore ask her, "How are you doing now?"
Lucy wasn't sure how to answer it. Somewhere she was sad that for all these years Samuel had lied to her and then somewhere, she felt relieved that she was not part of Samuel's life anymore. It was a mixed feeling and her coming here to Theodore's room, she didn't know what she was thinking. It must have been her guilt and worry, but that didn't let her forget the pain and the amount of tears she had spilt.
Theodore let Lucy know, "Calhoun will support whatever decision you make."
"I know," whispered Lucy. She knew Calhoun would always support her, since he had arrived at the castle years ago, he had always protected her and that was why she believed in him.
"I should get back to my room," said Lucy, picking up the first aid box in her hand. But before she could reach the door, Theodore called her name.
"Lucy."
There was no 'Lady' or 'milady', just pure Lucy and it had her clutch the box she held in her hand. When she turned to him, she saw him stand and raise his hand towards his face. "Thank you for this," there was that gentle smile on his face, the same one that had made her fall hard for him and she had scr.a.p.ed herself in the past.
Their gazes didn't break and Lucy realized she was not ready to break her heart again. Not again.
"Goodnight," she whispered, picking up the lantern that she had brought with herself.
"Goodnight," Theodore responded back to her, watching her take her leave while he heard her heart thudding in her chest. He still affected her like no other had.